Posts Currently viewing the tag: "parenting"

Back in May of 1985 I was still just a kid and easily frightened by thunderstorms. So on the afternoon of the 31st, when I was out playing with my friends and the skies turned an sinister yellow and green, I jumped on my BMX and pedaled home as fast as I could. My fear…(Read More)

Recently my daughter, aka Boogieface, turned 10. As I’m sure you can imagine, this threw me into a bit of a panic. We’re talking The Big One-O here. Double digits. It won’t be long now before that second digit turns into a three and, well, we all know what happens then…(Read More)

Imagine having a goose for a pet. A Canadian goose. But not just any old Canadian goose. A hyperactive, disturbingly loud, never-tired-of-honking Canadian goose. Now strap a siren to the goose. A siren that never stops wailing, day or night. And make sure it’s loud. So loud that it rattles your…(Read More)

I was out and about around lunchtime the other day, so I decided to swing by my kids’ school to see if I could catch them out on the playground. It had been a tough day, news-wise (go figure), and I just felt like I needed to see them and make sure they were…(Read More)

The sound of the bathroom door awoke me. A light in the hallway, then a tinkling sound. One of the kids must have gotten up to go pee. Either that or we had a tiny-bladdered burglar. As the toilet flushed and the light went off, I relaxed and prepared to fall blissfully back into…(Read More)

So it’s Super Bowl Sunday and the fam and I, as is our annual tradition, are chillin’ (more like boiling) in our friends’ hot tub before the big game. Now, my wife, Boogieface, and I all understand and appreciate the true purpose of a hot tub: relaxation. The Animal, however, sees it as his…(Read More)

Chinese water torture. That’s the most accurate way I can describe what it’s like having two, sometimes three kids, fresh out of school, all hopped up after sitting in class all day, coming home and invading what for the previous seven hours had been a quiet, peaceful sanctuary. It’s actually kind of…(Read More)

I thought about recounting in detail everything that’s happened over the past six days, when my sister, brother-in-law, and their four young daughters came in from out of town and stayed with us. But honestly, it was pretty much all one big, chaotic blur. And, besides, I’m just too tired. Instead…(Read More)

It’s funny, you’d think parenting would get simpler as you go. After all, most things tend to get easier with practice. Not so. Not only are my kids becoming more unmanageable by the day, but the strain of the job itself, i.e., being a stay-at-home dad, is really starting to…(Read More)

Despite my high hopes, nothing really extraordinary happened during our little Memorial Day weekend road trip. No ghastly injuries. No demonic possessions. Darn. Regardless, I thought I’d share some of the highlights: Around noon on Saturday, we arrived in the tiny hamlet of Chagrin Falls, Ohio, which was quite lively due to its annual…(Read More)